It is hard asking for what I want. As a recovering people pleaser, I used to believe it was my life’s calling to make everyone else happy. On May 8, 2010, I decided it was a good day to tell my family what a perfect day would look like to me. After all, it was Mother’s Day! The following day I wrote in my soul book (aka journal): “Yesterday I had the best day! I found the courage to write my best day on the dry erase board and it all happened and more. It went something like this:
- breakfast on the deck
- a bubble bath
- lunch at a park
- read in the hammock
- dinner on the deck
- game of ultimate frisbee with the kids
I am grateful my family honored my ideas for an ideal day, but then again it was Mother’s Day! A bigger challenge for me is to have the courage to speak my truth on a daily basis. Speaking my truth does not mean I will always get what I want, like I did on Mother’s Day, but it is important I add my voice to the mix. When everyone's voice is in the mix then it is an opportunity to practice the skill of negotiating. Negotiating is a great skill to learn. Our marriage counselor used to point out that marriage is all about negotiating!
The following symptoms flare up when I do not have the courage to speak my truth: I become resentful, passive-aggressive, play the martyr and let emotion build up and a poor soul gets my misdirected anger. It’s been said that the hardest part of being a woman is telling our truth, all of it. Do you agree?
In what situations is it hard for you to speak your truth?
Who are the persons in your life that honor your truth?